Reset Families Book – Chapter 4 Overview

Setting Clear Expectations

Learn how to identify clear behavior expectations that let your kids know what you want, and how those expectations move toward your shared family vision. Discover how to have an intentional conversation with your family about rules and expectations. Learn how to provide consistent feedback to your kids about how they are doing at meeting those expectations.


“When we think about rules it is easy to get a whole list of “Don’ts”: No running, no screaming, no unkind words, no swearing and no back talk. But that is going counter to what we are trying to achieve here. In many arenas, rules are stated in the negative, like the circle with a line through it over guns or drugs, for example. Rules stated from the negative feel power laden and controlling. They describe what has to stop, but don’t give suggestions about how to replace that behavior. It works best to speak to the kids from the positive. What does positive behavior look like?”

See Additional Resources to view more tools for this chapter.